my friends

This past week has probably been one of the most difficult weeks of my life, emotionally. It's only going to get harder, i have a feeling. I had been starting to doubt some of my friends, but it turns out they reinforced my beliefs in them. All of them did. I am truly thankful that I have such wonderful people that I can call friends, and that do the same for me. It always feels good to catch up, and sometimes it only takes one conversation to feel completely reconnected to somebody. Sometimes I am the one to initiate it, but I don't mind, if it's reciprocated. It took me this long to gain such wonderful friends, and I hope I have them for another 23 years, and well beyond then.

The holidays are coming up, and although i want to shout out an extremely sarcastic "Happy f%^&*ing Holidays!" because the phrase seems pretty ironic considering the stress that they usually cause. Where exactly does the happiness lie? Not sure this year. For me, anyway. Christmas has always been the one holiday I really looked forward to because it was almost a guarantee that my family would be together. Mom wants to go on a vacation. I feel so guilty that the thought of going to a tropical island on Christmas and drinking fruity cocktails all day while lying in the sun isn't panning out to be the paradise it should. I don't know how to feel anymore, really.

I've downloaded some pretty decent music lately. Well, I mean, everybody has their own opinion of what decent is but I think it's pretty good. Angels & Airwaves, Chris Cornell, Duffy, Kanye West...

I am so excited for March.

In March you'll know why. So stay tuned.